Image by Angela from Moon Mother Chronicles

35

MOST IMPORTANT LIFE LESSONS I’VE LEARNED TURNING 35 (2020)

This same month 35 years ago a little girl was born (aka.me) in a small town in Bangladesh with lots of dreams and a deep-rooted belief that human potential is limitless. She believed that anything in life is achievable as long as you dare to dream and worked for it.

Fast forward 2017, in the same month, I lost my old identity when my life hit rock bottom. I lost everything I had worked so hard and desired. Health, marriage, money, self-esteem, dreams all were gone. 

I was in the darkest point of my life where I had no hope to see the light. I even had no desire to live but was too scared to take my own life.  

When life left me no choice but to live, I decided to unlearn everything in life once taught and practised that no longer serve me. 

I decided to start a new life transformation with a beginner’s mind. I acquired new skills, got out of comfort zone, developed a growth mindset and seek fulfilment in life than focusing on materialistic goals.

This same month 2019, I lost my dad who was my role model, inspiration and my biggest cheerleader.

Fast forward today, I’m living a healthy, abundant, and fulfilling life where I’m overflowing with love, joy and light every day.

Today, I celebrate the birth of My authentic self and “Pursuit To Self”. 

“Pursuit To Self” is born to inspire and help YOU  to take the Next Action to intentionally create and design an abundant, fulfilling life well lived. It is my way of paying it forward and be of service to YOU. 

To know more about my story, check out here.

My dad devoted his entire life to be of unconditional service to others. I aim to do the same.

In the past 35 years, life has taught me many lessons to live in this earth school and fulfilling my life purpose. Some were transformative, some were very hard where I failed multiple times and others were eye-opening. 

I’m so excited to share today’s intentionally crafted blog post with the most important life lessons to learn to live an abundant, fulfilling life in my opinion.

I picked 11 most transformative lessons, ideas for each category –  health, growth mindset, spirituality PLUS 2 Bonus lessons.

Enjoy reading and be sure to leave a comment down below to share your top life lessons.

35 Important Life Lessons

While I can easily add 100 lessons to share in each category, I've selected top 11 lessons for each of these categories which made most impacts on my life. PLUS two Bonus life lessons at the very end. Enjoy reading !

Growth Mindset

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Health

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Spirituality

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BONUS

Learn More

Life Lessons for Growth Mindset

01  Find and create your WHY

“Start with Why- by Simon Sinek”– this idea fundamentally resulted in major mindset shifts in my life. If you haven’t read this book, I highly recommend reading.

In this book, the author talks about “people won’t truly buy into a product, service, movement, or idea until they understand the WHY behind it” in the business context. In my opinion, this concept is equally important and applicable in personal life as well. This idea is deeply rooted in my life right now.

Have a powerful “Why” behind any action you take in life. You are much likely to follow it through when things get hard. And it will.

Check out this blog post where I talk about this concept in detail and how you can apply in your life Right Now.

02 Take 100% complete ownership of your life

So here is the bad news. No one is coming to save you BUT the good news is you can 100% co-create your dream life with the universe. When my life hit rock bottom in 2017, I deeply realized this fact and the only way I could rebuild my life was by taking 100% ownership. I was in that situation because of an accumulation of poor decisions I made earlier in life, Period. No external situation or people to blame.

Whether its health, wealth, mindset, relationships or any other areas of life, it can get better once you take full charge of it. Remember life happens for you, Not to you. So take full ownership and commit today to transform your life for the better.

Life doesn’t happen to you, it happens for you.

Tony Robbins

03  Discipline is freedom

Often discipline is perceived as a rigid thing. But in reality, it allows you to create amazing results and achieve success in life.

When I started religiously following my daily routines, I started to see incredible results. Losing 35kgs weights over 4 months, gaining new skill sets, reading more books, working on side projects alongside a full-time career to name a few. It’s not that suddenly I had more time in a day but being disciplined and following daily routine allowed me to structure my day better. I became more productive.

Ask yourself – which areas of your life right now missing structure? Is it health, finance, or relationships? Once identified, simply commit to it.

04 Just Start

As a type-A personality, I usually like to plan things in detail and understand the short term and long term goals. But over the years I’ve learned, this is one of the major roadblocks to hinder progress. It’s good to have a plan and vision but unless you start taking any action, nothing will happen.

There have been many times, where I had amazingly creative ideas in my mind and spent weeks thinking and planning but none of those turned into reality because of all the analysis-paralysis.

Don’t kill your dreams waiting. The key is starting, be open to learning, and flexible enough to pivot. The only way you will know whether it’s going to work out or not is simply by taking actions.

05  Walk your own path

Like most other Southeast Asian kids, I’ve grown up with a mindset that I have to follow the social blueprint. By certain age I have to complete education, then have a successful career and raise a family. And to be honest, I exactly followed that thinking that’s the only way to achieve success. Only to realize, later on, achieving materialistic goals without purpose and fulfillment are not much of a use.

Don’t compare yourself to anyone else. Walk your own path. Fortunately, we are living in an era where unlimited choices & opportunities are available to everyone. You can start today no matter what phase of life you are in and still create a thriving life.

06 Be a lifelong learner

Fortunately, I’m always hungry for learning which gives me a competitive advantage in many areas of life. I got this trait genetically from my dad.

At the age of 69, my dad completed a Diploma in Computer Science & AutoCAD (3yrs degree) alongside his full-time profession as a civil engineer to ensure his knowledge is relevant to the market. He had to commute 3-4hrs a few times a week to another city to attend classes. It showed me his dedication to knowledge.

Embrace the word “learning” over “failing”. Life is a marathon, not a sprint. The only way to ensure you are part of the game is by acquiring new skills, knowledge, and keeping yourself relevant.

“Stay Hungry Stay Foolish”

Steve Jobs

07  Emphasise growth over speed

To cultivate a growth mindset and live a purposeful life, it is important to focus on quality progress while aiming for the end goal. The joy of this life is in the journey not in the destination. Because there is no destination. We are an eternal soul.

Reflect on your life – “Is there anything right now not working despite how much you are putting effort?” “Can you see a pattern?” Maybe it’s trying to show you the lessons for your growth. Pay close attention.

08 Embrace & accept your authentic self

We all have our gifts and imperfections. Use your gifts to make an impact in your life and others who come along in your path. You are worthy of an abundant and thriving life. There is absolutely no one you need to seek approval from.

Unapologetically and completely embrace your uniqueness and authenticity.

In this world, you're either growing or you're dying, so get in motion and grow.

Lou Holtz

09  Say YES

When we say YES to things or people where it’s not aligned with our values or mission, we are saying NO to the opportunities that truly matters and sparks joy.

Say YES to the course that you wanted to do always. It might be uncomfortable or scary. But do it anyway. Start that business, reach out to the person you love today. Say YES to experience this beautiful life fully.

10 Expectations

Not everyone in your life will be a cheerleader for your mission. Everyone has their values and priority.

Stay away from projecting your values, priorities onto other people. This is a sure recipe for disappointment.

11 Be of service

A study performed on the people from the Blue Zone area of the world showed that people’s happiness increase by 15% when they are connected and surrounded by community. The true essence of happiness comes from giving.

You will create space for abundance to flow when you give. Give your time, attention, care, wealth, knowledge whatever you can. Give unconditionally. Give to those who never can pay you back.

35 life lessons I've learned when I turned 35 (2020)

Life Lessons for Health

12 Breathe…Breathe….Breathe

Breath is the only trusted companion who will remain with you until the last moment of your life. Despite we take this for granted and not pay attention to the quality of breathing. Learning abdominal or Diaphragmatic breathing can alone change your entire life. And I know it’s a big statement but true.

Take your next breath deeply and slowly. Simply inhale for 5 seconds, hold for 1 second and then exhale for 5 seconds.

13 Meditate

Oh  Yes….I can put this in all areas of life just because it’s that powerful. Meditation is a powerful tool that scientifically proven the most effective way to create a disease-free body and mind. There are various forms of meditations available you can choose.

Practice stillness every day and express your gratitude for this beautiful body that you are gifted.

14  Ayurvedic Dosha (body type)

Understanding your body type according to Ayurveda can take your health and fitness game to the next level. When it comes to the body, it has to be an individualistic solution and you don’t need to spend a lot of money to achieve.

Identify your Dosha (body type) according to Ayurveda. Craft your diet and fitness plan according to your own Dosha. Check out this blog post where I deep dive into this topic.

15 Listen

Inside our body, there is a huge communication network where every organ is communicating with each other all the time. When any bodily function needs more love and help, it sends subtle signals to us. If we continue to ignore those signals, it becomes whispers then screams.

Literally, listen to your body daily. Curiously observe how it’s feeling. Is there anything out of ordinary? Seeing the imbalances early is the best way to bring yourself back into balance. Educate yourself and get the knowledge to become your own healer. 

16  Mindful eating

You are what you eat. Craft your diet with extreme caution according to your body type and health goal. Again no one solution fits all. Incorporate more seasonal fruits and vegetables into the diet.

Educate yourself with different available food choices. Incorporate the magic superpower of Herbs and spices in your daily diet. Check out this blog post on the healing power of Herbs.

17 Intermittent fasting

People who know me can tell how much I’m passionate about this topic. This alone played a huge role in my life transformation. Weight loss, combating depression, curing severe hormonal imbalances are many of such benefits.

If you haven’t yet, give Intermittent Fasting a try. Mental clarity, longevity & vitality, chronic disease prevention are many of the benefits you can experience. To learn and get started with easy steps, then check out this blog post.

18  Food combining

I have been following a healthy, clean diet for several years now. However, a few months back, I was experiencing severe acne. I tried everything and I truly mean everything. From changing diet, workout, expensive skin treatments. Nothing worked. As I was about to lose hope, I discovered the danger of food combining and how it can lead to building toxins in our body. It’s amazing how sometimes the solution to such a big problem lies in simple answers.

Be mindful of what food you are pairing in your meals. Wrong food choices combination can lead to serious digestive issues and toxin build-ups in your body. I will make a future post about this topic as it’s so vast topic and so personal to me.

19 Reconnect with mother earth

One of my favourite weekend rituals after a long run in the bushland is walking barefoot in nature and hugging trees. By earthing, our body’s internal bioelectrical field is stabilized with mother earth’s vast electrical field. There is tremendous healing power in earthing.

Ground yourself daily, and spend as much time in nature. You can deal better with stress & chronic pain, inflammation, and may more just by simply walking barefoot. How cool is that!

20  Find your movement

In my Pursuit To Health, I deeply understood that no one single prescribed fitness regime can give me the result I was seeking. It takes tests and learns to find the right kind of physical activity that is just effective and produce results. Not too hard or too gentle on the body.

Find your movement and move your beautiful body with love every day. In this article, I talk about how you can design your movement according to your Ayurvedic Dossh that will take your fitness game to the next level. 

21 Quality Snozzzzzzzzz

Oh boy….. Sleep is something I’ve struggled big time in the past specifically after diagnosis with Sleep Apnea several years back. I had to learn the hard way to prioritize my quality sleeping time. I’ve always believed in hustling and viewed sleep as unproductive. I had so wrong idea about it. This is far from reality.

Prioritize your sleep. Create a beautiful ritual before going to bed. Put essential oils, block blue lights, do deep breathing. Trust me, the quality time you spend sleeping will yield you 10 X more productivity in the long run.

22 Create a ritual

This is something I love and look forward to daily after a busy hectic day. Every evening, I dedicate some ME time after exercise to nourish and pamper my body. It doesn’t have to be fancy all the time. Simple dry body brushing before shower, oil massage, a warm cup of infused tea, and a book to read or meditate. That’s it.

Create a daily/weekly ritual to honor, nourish, and pamper your beautiful earth suit you’re gifted. Save sacred ME time for yourself. Be fully be present and connect with your body. Touch your body, feel it, and listen to what your body is whispering.

35 life lessons I've learned when I turned 35 (2020)

Life Lessons for Spirituality

23 Meditate

As I said, meditation is powerful and can seriously change your entire life. Gone those days, when it was viewed as a woo-woo spiritual practice only for yogis or hippies.

Find a spiritual practice that helps you to connect deeper with the inner self. Do this favour to yourself. 

24 Develop & trust your intuition

A few years back, as I was signing my marriage papers, a voice whispered inside of me subtly “you are making a big mistake”. I thought it was my fears & overthinking mind. That day, I was too quick to ignore that intuitive guidance. We all have intuition. Right now you are even using in your daily life without knowing it.

Unlock the ultimate potential of your life by using this super tool. Listen to your intuitive guidance daily. Learn how in 5 easy steps you can use this super tool to make better decisions and transform your life. 

25  Words are powerful

We are a spiritual vibrational being having a human experience. Word is nothing but vibration. The entire universe is created from vibrations. Spoken word shapes our belief system, behaviors, and reality. Different religions also highlight the importance of the spoken word.

Be mindful of your spoken words. Make a choice to say kind, positive, uplifting words always. First starting within your mind, to yourself and then every person you interact. You can impact others positively or negatively just by your words. 

26 Energy

We attract what we are NOT what we want. When I truly understood this concept, that’s when I started to see real results in my life. Dreams started to manifest in reality. Things started to happen effortlessly without a force. The only difference was, I shifted from feeling lack or wishing state to abundance & gratitude state.

Create sparks of joy in your life daily. Do at least one thing that gives you joy and takes you to the high vibrational energy. Move from a wishful thinking state to feeling an awesome state. In upcoming weeks, I will write a separate post on some of the easy & effective techniques you can use to create that shift right now in your life.

27  Masculine & Feminine energy

By personality, I’m very driven in life. Over the years, I created an imbalance in my life due to the career and lifestyle choices I’ve made. Without realizing, I was very focused on outcomes, goals, and milestones. I was on constantly in driving seat and trying to make things happen.

When I started to learn more about energy, I realized my masculine energy was imbalanced and dominant over my natural feminine energy. We all have both masculine and feminine energy. The magic will happen once you create a balance.

Educate yourself more about masculine and feminine energy and the role it plays in your life. Understanding this concept will significantly enhance not only the romantic relationship but overall quality of life. 

28 Forgivenesses

Each of us goes through difficult life experiences like betrayal, wrongdoing by others at some point in life. One of the key lessons for spiritual growth is to practice the art of forgiveness. Forgiving does not diminish the other’s wrongdoing. It simply allows you to set yourself free from past emotions, hurt, anger. Holding on resentment can only continue to damage one person and that’s YOU.

Today, forgive that one person or situation that you’ve been holding on so tightly for so long. That person could be yourself if you are holding on to your past guilt and mistakes. I know it’s easier said than done. But it’s much worth your freedom. 

Resentment is like drinking poison and then hoping it will kill your enemies.

Nelson Mandela

29  Minimalism

On my journey to minimalism, I had to put decluttering into practice. You would think decluttering will not be an issue for someone like me who is mostly neat and tidy. I also believed that but was proven wrong when I started to learn more about minimalism.

When I started to take a serious look into all of my possessions and make a list, it was overwhelming, to say the least. Mostly for the fact that I had no idea about some things I bought and things they no longer spark joy. I was blocking abundance to flow through in my life by holding onto things, people, relationships that no longer served me anymore. Decluttering is not only about physical space. It’s also applicable to mental and energetical space. Everything is energy.

To experience full abundance, make space for new things to come in life. Take a serious look into your life. Where you are holding onto things. Is it your physical space? Are you buying the latest and coolest things just to fill up a void in life? Are you holding on to toxic relationships that no longer serving you? Let it go with love and full gratitude.

30 Miracles are everywhere

My best friend often used to say to me “Believe in magic, not logic”. I never quite understood the deep meaning of this until very recently. I realized, experiencing a miracle is a mindset. It’s how you view whether the glass is half full or empty. According to your belief system, the universe presents more similar situations to you. I highly recommend the book “May Cause Miracles by Gabrielle Bernstein” if you haven’t read yet.

Open wide your mind & life to experience miracles daily. They are everywhere and right now you are also experiencing. But you might not able to see because of your past conditioning and belief system.

31  Law of polarity

According to the Universal Law of Polarity “Everything is dual, everything has poles, everything has its pair of opposites, like and unlike are the same, opposites are identical in nature but different in degree, extreme meets”. Sun and moon, light and shadow, love and hatred, joy and sadness, abundance and lack. One doesn’t exist without the other.

Understand pain and pleasure are inseparable in life. The magic happens when you balance. As a spiritual soul, you are on this earth to experience both. That’s called being human. 

32 Self Love

Ooooh, dear!! I’ve struggled with this one BIG TIME. I know, many of you also do the same. I had a very limited belief where I perceived self-love as an act of selfishness. Self-love doesn’t mean to get a spa, buy luxury things. It’s much more than that.

It’s making choices that are good for your own life and your loved ones too. Whether it’s a choice to start exercising to get healthy, making time to nurture your soul, making time to do things that creates joy. We are too quick to say YES to other people’s priorities and say NO to our own. You cannot pour from an empty cup, PERIOD.

Unapologetically love yourself and fill up your own cup first. Once you’re full of joy, you can bring happiness to the lives of your loved ones. 

33 be love

Love is a CHOICE and an act of practice. It’s that invisible thread that ties the entire creations together. Without love, none of us ever will exist. It’s within all of us. Be love to you and others who crosses your path in life. You can disagree or not enjoy another person’s company but still, you can love them. Bless them.

Choose love and light as your dominant energy daily. Ask yourself, “How you can be love?” in any situation.

Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.

Rumi

Bonus Life Lessons

Here are the final two lessons that sum up everything in my journey thus far. Surrender and living in the present moment didn’t come easily to me as a type-A personality who loved to control the outcome. But now I find joy, peace and fulfilment in life using these two tools.

34 Art of surrender

Practice the Art of Surrender. Do your work and leave the outcome to the universe.

You can't connect the dots looking forward; you can only connect them looking backwards. So you have to trust that the dots will somehow connect in your future. You have to trust in something - your gut, destiny, life, karma.

Steve Jobs

35 live today

Make every moment count, stop living for a milestone, and start living Today.

In the comments section below, share with us which life lessons resonate with you? Also, share with us if you have any other life lessons that made an impact on your life?
Also don't forget to tag me @iamtaslimbegum on Instagram and share your life lessons!
Lots of love & light from my soul to yours!
Taslim

P.S. Please remember to always consult with your doctor or health practitioner before trying any new health, diet, or lifestyle practice.

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